


what a wonderful world

by milkyskeleton (orphan_account)



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hospital, Alternate Universe - Mental Institution, Feels, Hope, I Made Myself Cry, Illnesses, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Nagisa being Nagisa, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Rocket Launchers, Romance, Symbolism, This Is Not Going To Go The Way You Think, a lot of references to stars, author projects on characters, idk what to tag this, life is beautiful y'all, like a lot, writing this to restore my faith in humanity
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:34:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27458056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/milkyskeleton
Summary: "Life is really simple, it is us who insist on making it complicated."- Confucius
Relationships: Ikari Shinji/Nagisa Kaworu
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	what a wonderful world

" _Que Sera Sera_

_Whatever will be will be_

_The future's not ours to see_

_Que Sera Sera_

_What will be will be,_ "

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

The boy sat in his rocking chair.

Well, it was not _his_ rocking chair per se, rather it belonged to everyone who wanted to use it. For it was not his _own_ , and maybe he should get up to let someone else sit there -

And, well, the boy sat in his rocking chair.

A book rested on the white table to his right, face-down and abandoned three pages in. The boy had read it a thousand of times before, and he'd read it a thousand more times to come. But for now, the book rested on the white table to his right, face-down and abandoned three pages in.

Somewhere in front of him a blue bird sang a song. Well, he wasn't sure it was a blue bird, but that's what it sounded like. He squinted in the light, barely making out a round circle vaguely fitting for the sun. Faint dots already splattered the sky, but they were so transparent that the boy couldn't see them even if he tried to. But he knew they were there.

Someone behind him spoke, their voice like a cold splash of water against the sitting boy's skin. He turned around, making the chair squeak almost as loud as the other person's voice had been.

A girl stood there, perhaps close in age to him, speaking to three other people. They had excited expressions on their faces, their smiles somehow seeming too bright for the boy's eyes. He had to squint at them as he'd done at the sun.

“Tomorrow!” the girl said to her companions, eyes having a glint the boy had not seen very often. Perhaps because usually he only looked in his own eyes in the mirror. They certainly did not have that glint in them.

The teens laughed and the boy sat in his rocking chair.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


“How do you do?” the redhead woman asked him, offering him a smile that made her equally red lipstick gain a shine to it. She leaned on her mop, purple glasses sliding down her nose a little.

The boy pulled at his white shirt, and scratched at his cheek. “I'm fine, and you?”

The woman's smile widened as she replied enthusiastically, making her green earrings jingle from left to right. The boy watched her and offered her a smile of his own.

A wonderful way to end the day.

His steps echoed around the empty corridor, an almost metallic tinge to the sound. He turned the corner and came to a stop at his favorite hall. A long one, with windows covering the whole wall on the right.

He opened one of them, letting the cool night breeze in. He leaned against the ledge and rested his chin atop his palm. The stars were looking particularly pretty tonight, the boy fancied. A huge, round circle of light faced him, almost as if it were greeting him.

“Hi,” the boy murmured back.

“Alone tonight?” the stars glittered, winking at him. The boy smiled.

“Mhm, tonight.”

He closed the window and walked towards his room, steps echoing around the empty corridor, an almost metallic tinge to the sound.

The boy rested his head against the pillow and watched the white of the ceiling change shades from the shadows jumping across it. A plane flew above his head, leaving a cloud of white in its wake. A man stood in front of a microphone, singing silent songs and looking straight at the boy.

The boy fell asleep.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


“ ! I got it!” the light-haired girl smiled at him, raising a metallic screwdriver in the air and pointing it at him. He smiled at Rikari, pulling the object from her hand and using it to screw the nails back in place.

“Thanks! It's a good thing you found it so soon,” he said, watching his hands fix the colorful wires.

“Yep, couldn't have us busting this open, could we?” the girl laughed back at him, pushing her purple glasses back up her nose.

The boy stretched in his chair, grabbing his orange juice from the table and having a sip or two. He rolled his neck until he heard a pop, craning his neck until he could watch the world outside through the window. The stars winked at him.

The girl called out his name and said something, but the words blurred together and the boy did not make anything out.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


“Shinji, what are you doing still in bed!”

Ikari Shinji jumped up from his bed, one hand jumping towards his chest almost as if that'd slow down his rapidly beating heart. He exhaled loudly, running a hand through his hair and looking at the light-haired woman standing in the doorway, hands on her hips.

“Uh... huh?” his heavy lips moved on their own, brain still asleep and unable to form coherent words.

The woman rolled her eyes, but she did not seem mad. Rather fond, instead.

“Come on! Everyone's downstairs excited to meet the new kid and here I find you, still sleeping without a care in the world!” Nozomi pointed an accusing finger at him, making Shinji look cross-eyed at her colorful rings.

“I didn't – I didn't know anyone was coming today,” Shinji stumbled to answer, already jumping up from his bed and fumbling in his dresser for something to wear. “I – I would've been ready if I knew!”

Nozomi exhaled in amusement, picking at her green nails as if to not watch Shinji change. He'd have not a problem even if she looked, considering he'd changed in front of her before.

“Alright, Shinji,” the woman said, shooting him one last glance from the doorway. “Try not to take too long, yeah?”

Shinji stumbled to pull his leg through a pair of pants, almost falling and hitting his head on the table. Almost, because he'd definitely not done that. Definitely.

He messily tied his shoelaces, turning his bedside lamp off. Only when he was already halfway to the dining room did he notice he'd forgotten his book in his room.

  
  


When he arrived he instantly took notice how everyone was buzzing with barely-concealed energy, and the entire room was waiting with baited breath. He managed to sneak up to where he could see Yasu standing without anyone noticing his late arrival. (except for Nozomi, who winked at him from her place in the front.)

He offered Nozomi a sheepish wave of his hand before he focused back on Yua-sensei who he'd belatedly realized was speaking.

“-ope everyone will make him feel comfortable here,” Yua-sensei was saying, and Shinji could see Yasu was standing on his tip-toes trying to look over the many heads in the crowd. He couldn't make anything out either, but he was okay with watching the girl's nape from in front of him.

Not – not in a weird way, of course!

He wasn't -

“Hey,” Yasu whispered to him, eyes still focused on Yua-sensei, whom Shinji really wanted to listen to. “Did you see him?”

“Who?” Shinji whispered back, scratching at his hands and only after realizing Yasu was obviously speaking of the new kid. Yasu didn't reply, but Shinji wasn't expecting one either, considering the whole crowd had erupted in cheers and claps.

Shinji jumped at the sudden noise, looking around him and wondering what he'd missed. He started clapping too, only to not be the only one not doing so.

During the whole ruckus he managed to catch a glimpse of burnt orange through the sea of jumping kids.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


“So? What do you say?” Yasu asked him, making Shinji look up from his plate of eggs. He looked back down, pushing around the pieces of ham.

“Yes, alright,” he answered, clearing his throat slightly, “But only one game. I have to finish my book.”

Yasu snorted fondly, before playfully bumping his shoulders with Shinji's. “Of course you do.” he turned around in his chair, already moving onto another subject, “Hey, Ri-chan you -”

Shinji smiled slightly, gazing down in his glass of water. It was clear, allowing him to see the slight condensation building on the outside and the faint stain on the inside. He pulled out his book, resting its cover on the table, holding it with his right hand and picking at his eggs with the other.

“-old you not to read at the table!” Shinji jumped at the voice, noticing a shadow had fallen over the table. He turned around in his seat, blinking in confusion.

Nozomi huffed and crossed her arms, gazing down at him with poorly-concealed amusement. “Come on, Shinji. You've read that book a thousand of times! Don't you want to try another one? And -” she pulled his book from his hands, closing it carefully as he'd warned her to do the many times she'd mistakenly bent the pages' corners. “Not at the breakfast table!”

Shinji rubbed his neck. He'd forgotten about that. “Sorry, Nozomi-san.”

The woman pushed his shoulder lightly, before turning around to yell at Fiku who'd stolen the food from everyone at her table.

Shinji watched them, eyes following on the many heads surrounding that part of the room. Now that he thought about it, there were more people than usual in that area. He shot them another curious gaze before looking back at his plate.

“I'll be back,” he told Yasu, pushing back his chair slightly and brushing at his hair as he subconsciously did.

After he was successfully out of the dining room and in the empty hallway, he allowed himself a moment to exhale. He took a step, then another, then a few more until he was leaning on the only open window. Which he hadn't opened now that he thought about it – Who had opened it? Maybe Nozomi-san, though, no, probably not- Maybe Ri -

Someone was cheering in the dining room. Multiple someones. The sound was muffled by the closed doors, making the echo seem almost as if it were sunken underwater. Shinji turned to stare at the empty white of the door. Someone was cheering in the dining room. Shinji turned around and walked towards his room.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


Dinnertime was arguably Shinji's favorite moment of the day. While everyone was still eating, he could sneak out (well, it wasn't necessarily _sneaking_ _out_ , but rather just - ) and open the window in the empty hallway.

And so he did, and so he leaned against the ledge, chin propped up in one hand, the other bent underneath him, almost as if to keep it in check, lest it do something ridiculous, like reach for the stars -

“Hello,” the moon said, this time its fully-teeth-ed grin barely crooked to the right. The wind ruffled Shinji's hair as Yasu had done earlier that day when he'd taken his rook off the table.

“Hi,” Shinji said back, as he did almost every evening.

“Hello.” Shinji did jump at the voice this time, because it had been neither him, nor the moon. His shoulders tightened, hands coming to wring his fingers together. He turned his head to the left, suddenly only now sensing there was someone else with him.

A boy was leaning on the ledge as well, body turned towards Shinji as well as towards the world. He had spiky, silver hair that looked exactly as to how Shinji imagined pieces of fallen stars looked like. His grey eyes (Grey? Were they grey? He couldn't tell in the dim lighting) reflected the starry sky, making Shinji stare at him unblinkingly.

The boy was smiling.

Shinji pulled back from his daze, taking a step back and throwing his hands up in front of him. Sweat was already gathering at the nape of his neck and it wasn't even warm there.

“U-uh, I was- I wasn't saying hi to _you_ , but -” Shinji stumbled out then stopped short. He could punch himself in the face. _What the – Don't just_ stand there _, fix this!_ “Did – Who are you?”

And he could kick himself too. He didn't even have time to think of other things to say, for the boy's smile had widened, eyes closing. _Oh, was he laughing at him -? That made sense, didn't it_ -

“Nagisa Kaworu,” the boy with hair made out of fallen stars said, reaching a hand towards him, almost tentative.

Shinji could've sworn he'd seen a shooting star out of the corner of his eye, but he did not look away from that one hand. Even if the silence stretched one, the boy remained undeterred, even shaking his hand a little as if welcoming him to grab it.

Shinji raised his arm, then dropped it, then raised it again.

“Uh -uhh – I-Ikaru Shinji,” he said back, grabbing that hand quickly, fearing if given the time he'd chicken out. Which, only belatedly made him realize he was shaking the boy's hand quite enthusiastically now, and _oh God he probably thought Shinji was so weird_ -

  
  


If the boy was put off by his behavior, then he gave no outward sign of it. He remained smiling – did he ever stop smiling, Shinji wondered then mentally kicked himself in the face, because _of course he stops smiling, you idiot_ – eyes opening once again and gazing right back at Shinji.

Shinji immediately found something else to look at, which turned out to be the boy's orange shirt. A burnt orange color to be precise. And Shinji was still shaking his hand. He quickly retracted it, stuffing it at his side, fingers clenched around one another in a poor effort to keep them still.

The boy merely smiled once again, saying, “I'm running a bit late to dinner, aren't I?”

Shinji was so distracted by the way the stars seemed to reflect in the boy's eyes, because he took a minute longer than natural to respond. “A-ah, yes! Dinner's already begun!”

“Then, would you -” the boy started, but Shinji hadn't heard him, because he was suddenly feeling very awkward and not at all in the right place of mind to talk to a weird boy with the night sky in both his hair and his eyes, and with moonlight in his voice, and he'd already made a dash down the corridor towards where his room was.

Which, he realized was possibly the rudest thing he'd ever done in his life, and he should probably go back, but that'd be awkward now, wouldn't it, and -

“ - accompany... me...”

But Shinji had already turned the corner and thus, did not hear him.

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


That night, he raised his glass of orange juice to his lips, grinning at Rikaru who'd managed to fix it in record time. He looked down at the liquid and noticed it was a burnt orange color.

  
  


  
  


  
  


  
  



End file.
